A day in the life of Sahara, at least during the week.
I think I’ve told you guys about the period of time I was a door canvasser with a political action group. I’d spend five hours a day knocking on doors, and follow it with a couple of hours of drinking. Crash somewhere, maybe home. Repeat. It was a lot of fun for awhile.
During this time, spending every day with hippies and slackers, when people asked how we were we would say noncommittally, “Oh, ya know. Livin’ life.” Which meant we weren’t doing shit.
This is another post I started and abandoned, probably in late 2015.
I found a blog that referred to going through life on auto-pilot. Before these big changes of a baby and a move, I felt like I was doing this, going through life on auto-pilot.
Anxiety is the dizziness of freedom. Soren Kierkegaard
I have been struggling for the past few days, again teetering on the edge of an existential crisis, similar to the one I had in the hospital this summer. I have been dizzy with the freedom of this life, and with the finite nature of it.
Every year, I set a certain number of “challenges,” or projects to accomplish. As the year goes on, I update how I’m going on the challenges, and write about a couple of them. I would love for you to join me! I could only come up with 10 for this year, though I might add some as the year progresses.
At poignant times like this, the birth or death of a love one, a sacred chasm is open and it is easier to peer into and make sense of things beyond.
Today seems like it has been a full circle. This morning, I wrote this:
I heard one of those songs today about mortality, reminding me that everything will pass. Everyone will die. That nothing is permanent. Then in the end it reminded you that you are surrounded by awesome people, and tell ’em now they are the bee’s knees.
Yesterday, I had one of those rough adulating days. I had a lot of little things to handle and they all suck.
Just an overview of me.
A: AGE | 38
B: BIGGEST FEAR | Something bad happening to Wee One or Cohiba
If we were having coffee, I would talk to you about headaches I’ve been waking up with because I have a lot I’m thinking about. It’s like the weight of your thoughts literally feel like a weight; has that happened to you?