Category: Life – It doesn’t live itself

Far Far Far and Away Away Away

~ Sahara ~ 3 Comments

When I was a little girl, I wanted to be an astronaut.  Actually, I wanted to be the first woman to go to Mars.  (I figured that men would already be there, and I already knew, even at five years old, that women had less privilege than men, and I thought it was that much more important that I go.)

In my imagination, the furthest I’ve traveled from home is into space, into a black hole. They are fascinating to a nerd like me, devoid of time, gravity pulling everything to it.  Nothing can escape; not even light. I used to like to draw a black hole and the event horizon surrounding it, the point at which you can’t turn back.

Why haven’t we been sucked into one, yet? Like, why haven’t all the black holes been sucking all the matter in space so much that there is no matter? And where is the center?  There has to be a point of, like, zero gravity, if you will, the point at which the sucking stops.  Where is that? What’s that like? Is there a vacuum bag? Where do all the rocks go, the rocks that are sucked in?

For realz, physically, the farthest I’ve been from home is Krakow, Poland. It was gorgeous and fun.  The Krakovian members of the travel community couchsurfing.com organized a weekend of events, and I went a few days early.  Poland had not originally been on my list of places to visit, but it was totally worth it

Emotionally, the farthest I’ve been from home was probably August 3rd, 1997, a little town in the boot heel of Missouri. The darkest night of my life.

Love Lovie

~ Sahara ~ 5 Comments

When I was a kid in St. Louis, my first grade teacher was the daughter of one of the coaches of the (then) St. Louis Cardinal football team (now in AZ).  The coaches would come to my school regularly and read to us, the students.  Lovie Smith read to me when I was seven.

I come from an IL family, a Bears family, but a part of my allegiance will shift to wherever Lovie is.

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times

~ Sahara ~ 5 Comments

I’ve been thinking a lot about Bastille Day lately, perhaps because I’ve been rereading a Tale of Two Cities, which I haven’t cracked since high school. At the time, though, I remember being engrossed with it, though I didn’t expect to be.

Also, Bastille Day approacheth on the 14th, so close to the US’ own Independence Day and so related to it.

I also like the way it’s pronounced in a beautiful native French accent – “Bastee.”

claude-monet-rue-montorgueil-paris-festival-of-june-30-1878

Claude Monet, Rue Montorgueil, Paris, Festival of 30 June 1878.

Look at this painting, the movement in it. You can almost feel the wind that’s ruffling the flags. Love it.

On the Edge of Two Eternities

~ Sahara ~ 6 Comments

Flash back:

The memory of my dad’s trumpet. I don’t have many good memories of him, but that’s one of them. Bike rides and summer days lived in the library because our house didn’t have air conditioning. Climbing the trees in my backyard. Moving to a different part of town for high school, feeling like I was telling the story from 90210. Marching band, and cool football night air on my cheeks sunburned from a week of afternoon practices. Music was a big part of those years. Maybe a threatening interaction before I went to Uni, a direct result of my dad’s nefarious activities. Car accident, coma, hard work and a triumphant return to building a life. Dad was cheating again in a way that threatened to put me out of school. This time, for the first time, I have the power to stop him from hurting me, and I do. He hasn’t talked to me since. I get closer to God and deal with health issues stemming from the accident. I backpack in England and Poland, and get a Master’s degree while working full-time.  A trombone player from that high school marching band finds me on and we marry, happy to have someone to sit with.

“In any weather, at any hour of the day or night, I have been anxious to improve the nick of time, and notch it on my stick too; to stand on the meeting of two eternities, the past and future, which is precisely the present moment; to toe that line.”  H.D. Thoreau

Flash forward

Our wedding, then going to Spain and meditating on the Alhambra grounds. My dissertation research. I keep dealing with issues from the accident, and get my hip replaced. Living by the water where I stand-up paddle board every day, and working at home with my husband. We move further inland, towards the mountains, and buy land. We build a small home and read together under the trees of our land.

(In response to Daily Prompt)