Google search, where would I be without you? This week, as I am undertaking my first NaNoWriMo, as well as ticking down the days before my first PhD application is due, I am a faithful visitor to Google.
Song as a Memory Finder
This week, there is a prompt about a song that really affects us, and while I don’t have the obsession over music that some people have, I do have one song that… I don’t know. I have a visceral reaction to it. The first 20 seconds of Pearl Jam’s “Nothingman,” affects me like I didn’t know a song could. Even as I listen right now, as I sit here and write this… My heart clutches and it’s hard to breathe. I close my eyes and shudder a bit. I feel like a balloon with the air suddenly sucked out.
No matter where I am or what I’m doing, when I hear this song, I’m immediately back in a darkened house in the dark wee hours of the morning. I was a different person that night and at that point in my life. Though I didn’t know it then, it was the lowest I would ever be – the night before the accident. The accident that nearly killed me. The accident I would give anything to have not had.
The making of an awesome character
I think the characters I appreciate the most are those of J.K. Rowling and the Harry Potter series. I’ve only just recently read through the series, and I’m so glad I didn’t start them until they were all out. I read through them like my life depended on it.
Three First Steps to Handle Any Conflict
1. Take a breath.
2. Step back.
No, literally. Take a physical step back from where you stand. Not standing? Can’t step? Shift your body a little bit, just a bit.
3. “Okay.”
For me, that is how all conflict resolution begins.
Two hopes for NaNoWriMo
I think I’ll be participating in NaNoWriMo, a writing challenge to write a novel of 50,000 words in 30 days.
I was pretty anxious about it, but then I remembered a story concept I’ve had for, like 13 years. Not a whole story, kind of an adaptation of another idea, but no one is writing it, it won’t write itself, and I want to read it!
To Hear The Poem of Creation
Remember the first time I traveled solo.
And I mean solo, really solo. I had taken a trip to San Francisco by-myself-but-with-others with Team in Training to do the Nike Women’s Marathon, and that was pretty cool. I went with other people to appease worried family members. But, in the spring of ’08, before I started my Master’s that fall, I wanted to go abroad. The problem was, nobody wanted to go with me. Rather, they did, but they didn’t have the money or the vacation time to do it, and they didn’t really have an interest in seeing what I wanted to see.
Sensitivity training
A daily prompt invited me to write about my weaknesses, or rather, the harshest but really accurate piece of feedback (criticism) I’ve ever gotten. I started to comment on it a few days ago, but got sidetracked.
I found this prompt asking me to poke into corners of my memory better left undisturbed, the neat packages that you can barely see for the shadows around them. Because I rarely poke into them, I liked the challenge of looking into something new. So, though I’m a few days late to reply to this prompt, I still like the exercise.
Express yourself to respect yourself (TM Madonna)
Okay, so the response to this prompt about not being able to verbally express yourself is kind of a gimme.
After my car accident and the coma, I had word finding problems, which is common for head injury. That didn’t make it more manageable at the time. It took me sooo long to get a sentence out, because I was trying to remember what I wanted to say! I felt so awkward with my friends because I felt so damaged and inadequate. My friend Darren from rehab was such a blessing for me during that time, ’cause we both spoke slowly, so I didn’t feel inadequate around him. I also remember the frustration I felt at not being able to communicate with others, and fearing that I wouldn’t get better; that I’d be trapped inside myself.
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Remember the time… Top three childhood memory pins
I have a board on Pinterest called “Childhood memories,” on which I pin things that, not surprisingly, remind me of my childhood. They usually bring back strong and compelling memories, things I haven’t thought of in a long ass time.
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Small thing, big joy
We moved offices at work!!
I normally don’t talk a lot about work; don’t grouse about what it’s like here, because I want to keep this blog separate from all that. However, I’m going to talk about it today, because we’ve moved offices!!
This is a change that I”ve been aksing for over the past several years, we just haven’t had the time or money or support to do it. Today it’s happened, and for the first time, I’m in an office with natural light. I’m sitting a bit away from windows so people aren’t staring at me all the time. There are plants in here.
This is beautiful.
