Starting Kindergarten During A Pandemic

You guys, I am having such a hard time with the start of school this year. Probably because it’s kindergarten, and that’s an emotional pain anyway, I think? But also because of COVID, she’s doing online lessons through the school district and it is clear they don’t know what they’re going to do. Not that I blame them, because they threw this together in just a few months, but it is unnerving.


I was talking to my neighbor today who has three kids, the eldest of whom is in fourth grade. I was talking to her about part of my confusion being I don’t have any other kids in school, and I don’t know the district at all so I don’t know how I haven’t been near an elementary school in 30 years.

She said that at this elementary school, they had parent and student days, not just the cheesy concerts, but like lunches that parents could come in and eat kids. I want that!

I think I’m in settled because things are changing but I don’t know how they’re changing yet. Or how they’re going to change we won’t be able to spend all day at the beach like we are now. Or will we? She’s learning at home; I can do lessons where and when I want, right? She’s in kindergarten, but is she separate I don’t know how I would feel about this in normal times, and I don’t know how to feel about it now.

I wrote that on the 22nd, and we’ve had almost two weeks of kindergarten now. I can tell the teacher is trying, and so am I, but it’s really hard. Kindergarten is supposed to be the time that you learn that learning is fun, or at least your tricked into believing it. I don’t wanna force her into doing things right now, and she’s got all these videos and pictures to do and upload. If she was older, fine, but she’s five. This computer stuff means nothing to her.

I know the teachers force things, but there is fun and friends, too. I can’t offer her what teachers in the classroom offer. I can offer for other things, so maybe I should focus on that. I am thinking about pulling her out and just homeschooling her for year. I don’t think I will, but it is really stressful and it sucks.

What Do You Do When It All Sucks?

Last week, as I was driving with Wee One, she heard me smack at a small bug that had flown into the car. She asked why, and I told her I was trying to kill an insect. She suggested that I shouldn’t because bats eat insects. I said it was a great idea and we should get a bat in the car to get the bug. She said, “Mom. Bats are nocturnal.”

Because duh.

Anxious Mother’s Stream of Consciousness During Toddler Swim Lessons

This past summer, I signed Wee One up for swimming lessons. Just six weeks at the community center, I wanted her to learn some respect for the water when she’s around it.

It was the first time she’d taken a formal-ish “class,” and I had some concerns. And other thoughts. Here’s a sampling of my second week’s thoughts:

****

Continue reading “Anxious Mother’s Stream of Consciousness During Toddler Swim Lessons”

Do you prefer dork or nerd?

Are you kidding me? I LOVE school! Love it so much I want a PhD.  Love it so much I want to do research and read and write all the time.  And maybe teach also.  I love it.  I just finished a master’s in the spring of ’12, and I was working full-time while I was going, so I was pretty fucking tired when it was done.  I was all geared up by the fall, though, and applied to eight PhD programs in social work for this fall.

Continue reading “Do you prefer dork or nerd?”